Every minute, 23 people become victims of rape, physical violence, verbal abuse or stalking by someone they consider their partner.

But not all signs of domestic violence are black and blue.

“A lot of times emotional, verbal, psychological abuse will break down the person's sense of self,” psychologist Kathleen McHugh said.

Do you know someone who suddenly has lower self-esteem, is repeatedly canceling plans outside their partner, and have their partner making all important decisions and dismissing their opinions? These are signs that something more abusive may be happening behind closed doors. 

Another nonphysical form of abuse? Financial abuse.

“Economic or financial abuse is the insistence on maintaining the only access to the money source,” McHugh said.

In cases of financial abuse, one partner has all the passwords to bank accounts and credit cards.

“You see that person being indecisive about spending money or asking for permission, those could be some of the more subtle signs,” McHugh said.

If your friend tells you that they are going through domestic violence, never tell them what to do.

“We want them to heal, we don't want to just have them to do what we think they need to do,” McHugh said.

The best thing you can do to help, be there for them, listen to them without criticizing them, let them know that in an emergency they can contact you and connect them with a mental health professional,” McHugh said.

If someone is in grave danger, you should call the police. But telling a victim what to do takes their agency away, which is exactly what the abuser is doing. McHugh says that while you can make suggestions, you need to honor where they are at and their own opinions.

Watch the video above for the full story.